Pop Christianity, Easy Forgiveness, and Treating People Like Tax Collectors
Many people seem to offer forgiveness far too easily in high profile cases. Something horrific happens, and the next day a victim speaks into a reporter’s mic, “I have forgiven them.”
“How?” I wonder. “You haven’t even felt the weight of the offense yet.”
Forgiveness is a hallmark of Jesus’ teaching and ministry. Unfortunately, pop Christianity often promotes easy forgiveness. Noted author Kaya Oakes has explored this along with the difficulties and complexities of forgiveness.
In Matthew 18:15–20, Jesus provides a process of reconciliation for his followers to follow when they have personal issues, and it is unlike any easy forgiveness. At the end, he offers a surprise with subversive implications.
One BIG Caveat
We need to talk about something before going further. Today we have a much more nuanced idea of how power dynamics work than people did 2000 years ago, and we have standardized ways of resolving certain conflicts unavailable to people in antiquity. So, it goes without saying that this teaching of Jesus does not apply to people who have suffered from acts of criminality, abuse, or violence. Anything illegal or abusive should immediately involve the authorities. Anything involving a misuse of power, such as in the workplace, should follow the proper avenues, including the HR department. This is especially true in Christian workplaces. If it involves a minor, a trusted authority (such as like a school counselor or Child Protective Services) should be contacted. And if a Church leader has committed a serious offense, there are legal channels to follow.
Jesus’ teaching on reconciliation in Matthew 18 is for Christians who are on relatively equal footing, and it may have been intended only for the original 12 Apostles.
This is quite a passage, maybe one readily ignored in practice. Jesus lays out a process for reconciling with other disciples “who sin against you.” This isn’t a blueprint to follow exactly, regardless of the severity of the offense. But it does lay out a general template for most of Christ’s disciples to work out their daily issues. With all that said, what’s involved in this conflict resolution?
“Go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.”
This involves a private meeting where the two can hash things out. The other person may not have known what they have done. Or they might already regret it. A misunderstanding may be involved. A private meeting leaves room for anger, tears, and honesty. Of course, it requires courage, especially depending on the severity of the incident. It can be hard to face a person and say, “You did this to me.” (Again, this does not apply to acts of criminality, abuse, or violence. Anything illegal or abusive should immediately involve the authorities.) Many arguments between Christians could be solved with a personal meeting, but it’s easier to rationalize, “They won’t hear me.” Or easier to go onto social media and complain to the world about how horrible the other person is. If the person refuses to listen, Jesus sets out the next course of action.
“Take one or two others along with you, so that every fact may be established.”
Take a couple friends for support and to listen to both sides. They might even serve as arbiters who can help lower tempers, clarify matters, and serve as witnesses that you’ve gone the extra mile. That doesn’t always work. At that point, the disciple should…
“Tell the Church.”
In the early days of Christianity, this would have involved a small group who would have known one another well. Many may have already known the issue at hand. As the Church grew, this step became impracticable. How might it work today? Depending on the issue, one might need to go with the witnesses from step 2 and visit church leaders for their advice. Or if it involves a Church leader, “telling the Church” may involve a parish council. If a higher Church official is is the offender, it may include going to a Church media outlet or even the community media.
This takes discernment, obviously. And none of it is easy. No one who has gone this far in the process wants their issue to become public. They risk so much, including not being believed or being targeted for retaliation. However, if someone has done all this, they’re certainly telling the truth and need to be taken seriously. But what happens if someone goes through all this, and the offending person fails to respond, repent, and reconcile?
“If he refuses to listen even to the Church, then treat him as you would a Gentile or a tax collector.”
Put it in the original context: A very small group of people who know each other very well, like the disciples arguing over greatness. The situation will probably get resolved, but if it doesn’t, things would be very awkward indeed. Everyone knows what’s going on, and they know who was at fault. For a first century Jewish audience, treating someone as a Gentile (heathen) or tax collector might mean separation, isolation, and shunning. Have no part with them. But maybe there’s another possible, more subversive interpretation.
How did Jesus treat Gentiles and tax collectors? He ate and drank with them. He went into their homes. He was known to consort with them. Maybe Jesus is saying something akin to, “If it gets to this point, the only way to resolve the situation is to forgive them.” Perhaps the act of forgiveness may shock or shame the person into repentance. After all, bringing about the other person’s repentance and to reconcile is the ultimate goal.
When an issue reaches this point, the “offending disciple” is no longer behaving like a disciple of Christ. They’re not listening to the person they’ve hurt, a couple other members of the group, nor the entire Church. They’re not accepting the fact that they have caused offense, and they’ve shown no interest in repenting of their actions. Jesus says that their poor behavior is no excuse for me to not follow Jesus’ teaching.
This extreme forgiveness involves picking up the cross and accepting the wrong that was done. (Again, refer to the caveats listed above.) This is a far cry from the easy forgiveness that so often characterizes public acts of wrongdoing and pop Christianity.
